I used to run away from everything. I have been called unstable, lost and told that I don't know what I am doing time and time again.
This used to break my heart 💔
And - it made for some deep self-reflection and consistent inner work with myself, counsellors and mentors over the years as people in my life would continue to say these things to me, so I looked at it. I took it on board.
And yet, I did it in a way that made me feel like something was wrong with me.
Of course I am grateful now, but gosh it knocked me down, tore my heart out and made me feel like I was broken for a long time.
Over the years and with deep self reflection I have learnt that I am not unstable.
Whilst the very people who told me I was unstable have changed jobs and career more times than I can count in the same time I have continued to build, expand and stabilise Reality Awareness.
Whilst the very people who also told me I was unstable and need to sort my shit out have moved house more times than I can also count.
Whilst I was training yoga teachers, being told by one of the head teachers I am not fit to teach yoga, let alone train teachers 😳#rightio
Whilst the very people who told me I was too emotional and that I have mental problems...
So. Many. Things.
All of these things broke my damn heart.
All this time.. I have and continue to build a company that has supported myself and my daughter for the last several years, have gone from solopreneur to entrepreneur and have learnt more about myself than ever before - let alone how to be a super sensitive, highly intelligent and ridiculously intuitive creative and function in our everyday modern world - let alone run a company!
At the time it cut me to bits... all their words. They super affected me - for ages. I guess that is my deep intuitive, sensitive big open heart.
I knew my vision - but everyone literally told me I was crazy in some form or another.
Funny thing about that... those people don't seem to say those things to me anymore.
Just because people don't share your vision, doesn't mean you need to stop or should stop or can't create it.
It just means you need to bawl your eyes out, shut the door on most of the those relationships for a time, pick yourself back up off the floor, keep going and show those mofo's what the fuck you're made of! 🙌🏻
I used to run away from everything.
I used to stop things, change things and then do the thing - again!
And yet - looking back?
After ALL those counselling, mentoring and training sessions - after ALL this time - everything they said about me?
In a sense that I am not broken.
I am not unstable.
I am not too emotional.
I am not... anything said person said about me!
I am highly intelligent.
I am a Goddess Queen who is soooo connected to the Divine it scares the shit out of 99% of people.
I trigger the FUCK out of people and I used to take THAT as a rejection that made me dim my light again because I didn't want to upset people.
I used to be soooo emotional - because I have held sooo much trauma hurt, pain and grief in my body that I wasn't allowed to express as a child, let alone generational carry down, let alone was supported in that in anyway, I was always told my emotions were bad. That something was just wrong with me. Yeah - my super sensitive empath heart was carrying soooo much!
I have learnt that my emotions are amplified 10 days before I bleed and that this is a time to be honoured. I have learnt that I am a powerful Intuitive Goddess who deeply is connected to what feels 100% right and in alignment for me and what feels 100% wrong and not in alignment for me - THAT is what my emotions show me. They are not BAD.
I have learnt that I am someone who likes to do A LOT OF THINGS AT ONCE. That this is how I honour my creative flow. I create ALL the things ALL the time ALL at the same time.
I change things all the time, stop things and then go back to them - this looks like chaos and instability to normal people.
HOWEVER - I have learnt that I am a LONG HAUL GAL!
I AM ALSO NOT A NORMAL PERSON!
I am different and I own that - now. #fucknormal
I STICK IT OUT UNTIL!!! #longhaulgal
That means that in the process of creating STABLE foundations - I create MULTIPLE pieces at one time!
When I look back - everything I have done, creating a zillion things at once in my business - these are now the back bone, foundation and the VERY thing that has stabilised my ENTIRE company!
So to all those people who said anything negative to me in the start and pulled me down about what I was doing with my life - I love you but 🖕🏻😝
LUCKY I CONTINUED to trust my intuition - even though I stopped things, changed things and then went BACK no matter what you said because I TRUSTED MY INTUITION - my Intuition ALWAYS won in the end, because I can not not LISTEN and trust my intuition.
I thank you for making me look long, hard and deep at myself because it made me STABLISE MY CRAZY and all the things you told me were wrong with me - are ACTUALLY MY STRENGTHS!!
It's why I have just had my biggest month ever last month (🥂🍾) and have finally found the KEY to why I was stuck for over 18months at the same point.
I didn't want to work hard and burn out with a zillion clients and working 18hr days hence why I stayed stuck at the same level for so long, because that isn't what I truly what I believed in my heart - knew what or how it was supposed to be.
I inherently knew that I could earn more and work less... and as soon as I began handing over to my team and going through the biggest recalibration of my life, all of a sudden I have been working less and earning more. How about that! #ofcourse
However - I have done that before - handed work over to team members and it failed time and time again in the past. Yet, I didn't let that stop me. I kept going until I figured it out and tried, time and time again. You only fail - if you give up.
There was a key piece that no body taught me and was something I figured out through a lot of pain and 'stuckness' until I realised what it was.
I used to run away from everything.
I am so grateful for all those people in my past telling me all the things they thought were wrong with me, or that I shouldn't be doing said thing.
I used to run away from everything - and I still do - run in the other direction from anyone that tells me that I should be doing something their way or that I am doing it wrong, although I don't have those sorts of people around me anymore, so it doesn't happen that often.
I process things DEEPLY and super INTRICATELY. That is my Gift I have realised, because not everyone can put those pieces together. It is definitely a skill and is what I teach in Trust Your Intuition.
I am a long haul gal.
Sometimes that is to my detriment.
However... through what others call chaos and instability....
Is the foundations for all that I have built.
People like us - we are different. We were born for this.
Our purpose is to keep the Chaos in order - that, is our Gift.
That is why we are the Leaders, the Entrepreneurs, the Healers - we hold Humanity together. We stabilise the energies that people have no idea what to do with. THAT is why we are born and to normal people, that is something they will never understand, nor need to.
Just because you are different to the way they do it....
Just because you took longer than them...
Just because they don't see your vision...
Just because they have no clue wtf you are doing...
Don't listen to them - because they don't know what you are doing so why the fcuk would you even?!
CELEBRATING MY BIGGEST MONTH EVER and the stability I have created in my business that has allowed me to arrive this far.
OF COURSE this happens on Crown Chakra beginnings - birthing new realities baby! But phew! Not easy at times... and yet... birthing a baby.. or a new reality isn't easy!
And yet... we are born for this! Or you wouldn't be here reading this
Where are my New Reality Creators??
Your vision is important - it holds all the secrets to your success. Don't bury it - flaunt it baby!
The Life Purpose Queen 👑
P.S. There is a time where you are understanding your gift, your sensitivity and what you are even here for - let alone why everyone always turns their back on you as soon as you open your mouth! #ouch
When you are trying to understand your spiritual gifts, figuring out whether you're highly clairvoyant or how do you even stop seeing those visions at night before you go to sleep or sensing that presence in your room or house or why is it so strong at times and then not others?!
Then there is a time when you are ready to stop being so confused and floored and ready to do this properly so you can truly change your life and stop being wiped by the energy time and time again.
There are only several more days before the investment for Trust Your Intuition increases where you can understand your gift, but also be able to support others without feeling burnt out or drained or working yourself to the bone - including for the people closest to you. Click here for all the details before this increases: https://www.realityawareness.com/trust-your-intuition