FAILED RELATIONSHIP AFTER FAILED RELATIONSHIP AFTER FAILED RELATIONSHIPJan 22, 2019
FAILED RELATIONSHIP AFTER FAILED RELATIONSHIP AFTER FAILED RELATIONSHIP
I SPEAK A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE. Some will understand, some won’t.
Take me deep and take me slow, just don’t make me weep and leave me in a heap. 💧
“I told you She’s the chosen One, and you didn’t believe me.” 🌟👽🌟
I meant to write this blog on Monday, but our Grandmother Moon, had different plans of releasing for me on Monday before I held our powerful Online Full Moon Ceremony. So here it is now.
I have been increasingly frustrated recently with this thing that’s been bugging me. I’ve been noticing it quite a lot and to be honest it’s been in the forefront of my awareness since about the end of September. Yet, it started to be quite in my face in late June last year and only in the past few days, has it dawned on me and so many pieces of the puzzle have come together. Nothing like a Blood Full Moon Lunar Eclipse to catapult one of the biggest depth of learning for me that closes off and finishes the past 6-8 months that has depths into significant Past Lives where Rising Lightworkers and Ancient Blooded Healers are reclaiming their gifts and rising in their power to seal the deal for Humanity! Thanks Grandmother Moon! #goodness
This thing that’s been bugging me and annoying me like fuck, is not what I have just found it in intimate & family relationships for like the entire of my life, but also in mentor relationships and it’s been pissing me off to no end.
Ive done depths of work on this for months and just last week diving into it again with my divine mentor Lois, did it finally unlock for me, well not in session, I left there feeling like we’d just tapped into something I didn’t want to face even though I didn’t know exactly what it was at the time, I felt super uncomfortable.
What is it that’s been significantly in my awareness since late June last year that’s been increasingly annoying me and pissing me off?
= I’m better than you.
= If you’re not doing this process this way, you’re doing it wrong.
= Your vibration is wrong change it.
= Don’t sit in your feelings.
= Don’t do Shadow work.
= Listen to me, (fill in the blank)
And then of course, = being cut off in every sentence so you cant even a get a word in.
And so much more.
Fuck it’s been pissing me off. I see it online with mentors, I see it in my family threads, I see it in relationships I’m in, I see it - fuck it’s been annoying me for months! (Consciously!)
I’m better than you, you don’t do this this way, so you don’t belong here. What the actual fuck.
And people wonder why there are wars on the planet!!
Superiority cuts us off from our Heart. Spiritual bypassing, living in our head, control, all comes from Superiority.
When Demon turned up the other day, I knew it was deeper and bigger than what I realised in that moment, just like when Grim turned up, I knew it was ‘bigger than us’. Demons are all about control. Some would say ‘evil’ to describe the energy of a Demon.
On the weekend, I found myself howling my eyes out with grief, I knew She was on the rise 🌕 but I didn’t know the depth She would take me...
I found myself questioning every single choice I had ever made, and it dropped me down into the core of when I lost my virginity at 14. I found so many patterns that flowed through me like a tapestry unweaving itself right before my face. 👁
What is with every partner I've ever been with saying one thing and doing things completely differently to their words?
What is with every partner I’ve ever been with hiding me from friends and family?
What is with every partner I’ve ever had saying they are loyal and dedicated to me, love me to no end, then at the drop of a hat, their blood family comes first?
What is it with every partner I have ever had, saying they love me and want to show me off to the world, but as soon as their friends are around, it’s like they don’t know me?
What is with almost every relationship I have had, that I have felt so deeply in my heart, loved to my core that they I end up with pneumonia the grief does that deep? (I've learnt to grieve properly after pneumonia hitting me more than once because of heart break!)
Thread upon, thread, upon thread, upon thread was unweaving itself right in front of my weeping eyes. 👁
What is with this Superiority? Oh. It’s me. I’m the one who has the Superiority thread. I guess I never saw it until the weekend. I asked myself what is the opposite of superiority then? Yes, one would say inferiority.... but what actually came to mind, was Equality.
They are on the same thread.
All this flooding of consciousness flowed through me.... and it made complete sense.... Demon... Demon made sense to me. Demons gift is Equality.
Superiority is control, is better than less than, is the core of all abuse. Spiritual abuse included.
And the big 👁opener for me.... oh. In all my relationships, I’ve stepped into this right away. Superiority. I’m better than you. You need to do this, this way, so then it’s all perfect. Control. No, you can’t do it that way, it has to be this way, you have to look like this and be this way, then it’s all perfect.
Perfectionism, another aspect of control.
Yet what’s really going on? Is that I just don’t feel good enough. That’s all.
I don’t feel good enough. I actually feel less than, so to hide that, I’ll flick into the over inflated ego space to hide my feelings of inferiority and step into control. In all areas.
Woah. Hello. 😭😭😭
Gosh. What a relief when that baby came out.
✨ WHEN THE CHANNELS OPEN ✨
Instead of seeing them as my partner I saw them as someone I could control. Why? I guess because I never grew up with Equality. It was always fighting for power, control - Love. Yet Love, was shown in the forms of power and control. It was just the way it was. It's the way the collective has been after WWII. Fear, power and control. Don't show your feelings, you'd be weak if you did that!
Gosh the things that come when you start to face your co-dependency. Let alone yourself. And that, like anything, is a work in progress and a continual evolution.
Talk about Generational Lineage release of abuse and patriarchal control. Collective Webs lifted. Huge.
The things that unravel on the Blood Full Moon Lunar Eclipse, that started all the back when this Eclipse season began.
Equality. Hello 👋🏻 #realityshifter
Humbled, in awe,
The Life Purpose Queen 👑
P.S. If you want the clarity of intuition to be able to put the pieces of the puzzle together for your own life and see the tapestry of the threads Unweave before your eyes and you release what no longer serves its energetic space, Trust Your Intuition is the place to be: https://www.realityawareness.com/trust-your-intuition